NASA’s announcement today that they intend to establish a permanent base camp on one of the Moon’s poles by 2024 has prompted much controversy among certain highly reliable unnamed sources, who believe a secret base is already there.
The purpose of the secret base is unknown, although insiders close to the program suggest it is may host a secret weapons system or a telecommunications intercept device for spying on the American People.
Despite enormous pressure from the current adminstration The Hairy Beast has decided the public interest outweighs security and presents to you now:
SECRET MOON BASE PHOTOS REVEALED!
In a stunning journalistic first, The Hairy Beast has received actual secret photos smuggled off this secret base by photo stringers hired by the Associated Press and Reuters which prove it already exists.
Secret Astronaut W.S. is rescued by the rescue/replacement team and carried to the secret NASA return vehicle. Inside sources believe he was incapacitated while working on a secret lunar based weapons system, details of which are classified.
Details behind the intent of this photo are very very sketchy indeed. Secret A.M. (foreground) and Secret Astronaut E.F. (hoisted on a shoulder, background) have been identified clearly as the second-wave station crew members. The identity of the third man in the picture has never been established.
BUSH ADMINISTRATION DENIES EXISTENCE OF SECRET MOON BASE!
When contacted by this reporter, spokesmen for the Bush administration strongly denied the existence of any moon base on the moon. Private sources, however, suggested privately that this base may have been in existence since 1966, and that actual video may be forthcoming.
Due to the unimpeachable quality of his sources, The Hairy Beast believes such video does exist and promises that when the DVD comes in the mail he will post it.