Breaking Beast News at:
The Saturday Maine Mutant Roundup
The Hairy Beast created this blog five days ago, and readership has been light, as expected. But something strange happened today – the hit counter started spinning like Linda Blair’s head! Suddenly hundreds of people were viewing this blog! And it’s still going!
For the first few hours The Hairy Beast indulged himself in the fantasy it was merely his genius catching on. But then he noticed that most of the hits were coming from search engines whose terms were:
The Maine Beast
maine news beast
beast found in maine
The Hairy Beast maintains his lair Southern New Hampshire, so close to the Maine Border he could literally throw a rock into it, but he has not made that information public. So why the frenzy?
A quick Google search solved the mystery.
The Hairy Beast wishes to reassure his readers that he is alive and well, he has not been to Maine in weeks and has no family there. His eyes only glow red when he’s had too many shots of the bar brand at his local watering hole.
As for the smell – he has had no complaints.
Well, not recently.
UPDATE (2:23 am EST): Ok, the counter’s stopped spinning. Back to the single digits and trolling for clicks on Phillipino Dating Sites.
UPDATE TO THE UPDATE (Saturday 8/19): The craziness continues – Google has listed this site second under Cryptomundo for web search terms related to the dead maine mutant. This blog is eight days old and it has had over a thousand hits today alone. So WELCOME SEARCHERS! The Hairy Beast will accomodate your interest with a new page devoted to the dead creature (an hour north of where he lives) that can be found HERE.